Being The Best Father You Can Be – Responsibility

Guys, I am here today to get to the first of three things we as dads/fathers need to know to be the best that we can be.  It is not an easy task to be a dad and even harder when we are going at it blindly.  Yet do not lose hope, for there is an instruction book already prepared for you by the best author ever.  Today we will cover a topic that we all need to hear about and take a close look at.

Being the Best Father



When I think of the responsibility of a dad/father, there are two verses that come to my mind.  Both of these verses speak of a direct job and responsibility of a father.  One is not to provoke your kids and the other is to train them.  Both are huge responsibilities of the father and they are both responsibilities that many of us push away and push-off to others to do.  But no longer, for the time has come for all dads/fathers to stand up and be responsible.

Do Not Provoke
Ephesians 6

Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
4 Fathers, don’t stir up anger in your children, but bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

Colossians 3:21

Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
21 Fathers, do not exasperate your children, so they won’t become discouraged.

What these verses are saying is that under no uncertain terms is a father to purposefully do things to make their kids angry, resentful, discouraged, scornful, upset or bitter.  However, there is a difference in doing what is right for them, even when it does not meet with their approval, such as disciplining, setting boundaries, and working chores and doing something that angers them for no reason at all like setting meaningless rules just because you are the father. Many times there is a fine line between the two sides and it takes discernment to keep from provoking your kids to wrath.

In many houses today, children are provoked to wrath or anger because of the father not being in the house! He may be in the house, however due to neglect, irresponsibility and selfishness of the father, the house does not feel his presence as a father. Then you have the opposite side of the coin where the father is to busy climbing the corporate ladder, personal hobbies, video gaming. In some situations the father is too overbearing and demanding of his family. There are times that fathers can be emotionally, physically and verbally abusive to their kids and family. Maybe the father is being hypocritical and demanding things of the family or kids that he will not do. These things can and will bring a child to wrath and anger. How many did you just see in yourself?


The second part of Ephesians 6:4 “but bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” is the second responsibility of a father. There is a larger need for this to be done today than ever before. According to the Bible, the father is to be the spiritual leader or head of the house.

1 Corinthians 11:3

Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
3 But I want you to know that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of the woman, and God is the head of Christ.


Ephesians 5:22-24

Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
22 Wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord,
23 for the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of the body.
24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so wives are to submit to their husbands in everything.

Under Christ, the father is the spiritual head of the house. His presence should be felt in the home, in its rules, its worship, and through the father’s gentle love, leadership and example. One of the biggest problem in the home today is that too many fathers are not spiritual men and this must change!

Deuteronomy 6

Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
4 “Listen, Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is One.
5 Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength.
6 These words that I am giving you today are to be in your heart.
7 Repeat them to your children.

It is the father’s responsibility to train or bring up the kids. In no way does this exclude the children from listening to the mother at all.

Ephesians 6

Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
1 Children, obey your parents as you would the Lord, because this is right.
2 Honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with a promise,
3 so that it may go well with you and that you may have a long life in the land.

Notice that it says for the children to obey their parents(plural not singular). The woman is there to be a helpmeet to the husband, but it is the father’s responsibility to be the one who trains the kids.

Another problem of many fathers is that we do not know what the “training and instruction of the Lord” is, let alone how to bring our children up in it. We must start at an early age teaching our kids about God and how to live by the Lord’s commands. Deuteronomy 6:4-9 tells us how we should do, when we should do, and where we should be teaching our kids. Fathers, it is up to us to train our kids even if you were not trained at an early age. That is not an excuse to use. “This was not done with me, so I don’t need to do it with my kids.” That is a direct disobedience of God’s word and you will not pass down a promise, but a curse.

Men, it is time for us to step up to the responsibility of being a father. For far to long, we have sat on the sideline and watched others raise our kids, teach our kids, and train our kids. We were men enough to bring them into the world, we should be men enough to lead them through the world.

Till next time,

You know that you want to say it....


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